If I could have switched places with you

A little over a year ago, one of my best friends and role models-Jon Chia-passed away. I had-and still have-a tough time coping with his passing, and a while back I entertained the idea of “what if I could bring back Chia at the expense of my own life.” A classic scenario that I’m fairly sure a lot of people who lose someone close to them contemplate. And I was trying to think of what I said. This morning I finally decided to polish what I had been saving for a few months and post it, just so I can have some peace of mind.

I miss you buddy.


Hey Jon! Look, I know you’re probably surprised….and pretty pissed off that I’m doing this. I have, what, about a minute or so before it’s “good game, well played,”  so hear me out, okay? No, shut up, the deal’s been made, don’t give me that look and please stop calling me a “dense motherfucker” I’m trying to be poignant here. We can talk later. Or not.

Look, the idea of a world where you’re not in it saddens me. And it sure as hell saddens a lot of your friends too. In fact, it’s not just sad, it’s just wrong! The world deserves better. It deserves a guy who cares a hell of a lot about it and is smart and dedicated enough to save it too.

But you know what else? Beyond all that grandiose world-saving crap? The idea of you and me apart strikes me as very, very wrong. Yes, I understand the irony in what I’m doing now, but listen.

Promise me this Jon. Keep being strong. Keep being revolutionary and brilliant and insane. Keep being you. Yes, that means keep being stubborn and sarcastic and sometimes a dumbass and good lord frustrating, but also wonderful.

Heh. And to think, I will never see you again.

One more thing Jon–one last thing–the most important thing.

Because I want to you to always know this, and because I never said it enough: I love you.



  1. Hey Adarsha,

    I found this through a FB page for Jon. This was very touching. I was just thinking about him today and it was… almost relieving… hear this. Jon was a good friend to me. I’m sorry for what you’ve had to go through, and scars like this never really heal, but I hope you’re doing well.


    • Terence,

      Will you consider talking with me, Jon’s mom, about Jon? As you considerJon was a good friend to you. I sincerely hope you would.

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